We’re talking about the Pallas Cat this week. Glen had no idea what that was. Jon thought he did. We just talked about cats a lot, and a decent amount about Cats, and honestly not enough about ALF. Our studio is frankly overrun with ghosts even though ghosts aren’t real. We want to hear Gordon Shumway’s rendition of “Memories”.
We’re back in studio to fire off some new episodes. The word Muppet comes from one thing doing sex with another thing. What things? Listen and find out. Glen is a comedian because of the Muppets. Muppets are great and you’re a fool if you don’t love them.
This should be the last classic episode for a while. Another surprisingly popular one considering we had zero idea what we were even talking about. You’re probably not going to learn a lot in this one.
Glen’s still on tour, so here’s another classic episode. This time, it’s our most popular episode ever; Marshmallow. Why is this our most popular episode? We don’t know. Marshmallows are fine, we guess? But like, why is this in the #1 spot? It’s a fun episode, for sure, but like… better than Mole People? Or Air Conditioning? Y’all love marshmallows, and we respect your life choices.
We’re still recovering from MusikFest and Glen’s getting ready for another tour, so please enjoy this classic episode of Improvised Wikipedia. It is in fact the MOST classic episode, because it’s the first one we recorded. LEARN ABOUT CARDINALS, Y’ALL.
Pennsylvania is ranked 3rd for Bigfoot sightings. Bigfoot isn’t real. Bigfoot shops at Giant, but isn’t real. But even fake animals love seltzer. Glen violates his SodaStream terms of service on the reg. Wookies are space bigfoots. Glen doesn’t believe in Bigfoot, but Bigfoot believes in himself. Glen’s tablet wasn’t working so he didn’t draw bigfoot and just used a photo of Harry from Harry and the Hendersons because it’s the best Bigfoot story.
KIND OF A BUMMER THIS TIME Y’ALL Who snatch that baby? Potentially Glen’s late beloved grandfather but it probably wasn’t him unless it was? THE GREAT BABY CAPER! Glen shares the harrowing tale of a time he had to open an airplane door mid-flight! Humphrey Bogart’s ghost stops by the studio for some reason.
Whatewegotta say here? Otters are cute as hell. Their turds have special names. What is it? Listen to the episode. We both like otters a lot. River otters are better than sea otters. They’re not rodents. Veeeeery little Buckaroo Banzai or Smashmouth talk in this one.
It was supposed to be Jon’s time to shine, but y’all done goofed it up. We love jokes, but they make terrible submissions when we ask for topics. We speed round some not-great audience suggestions (suggy jests). Glen knows how to love Glen. Jon knows Jon. Jon doesn’t chess. Sloths poop cute. Be specific about your hat suggestions or we’ll call you.
Shout out to undercover agent Kathy Quick for the suggestion this week. Rambutans are a fruit that look like weird alien balls. They’re pretty good. Jon’s never had one, but Glen has because he is worldly and kind. Get em at a grocery story and try em out. They yum yum.